Wanda Mann

How often have I prayed, Search me, God and know my heart; try me and know everything I worry about.  See if there are any wicked ways inside me and lead me in Your ways?  (Psalm 139:23-24)

Oh, I've prayed this more times than I can count.  Possibly because this is one of my highest pursuits; to be more like Christ.  (my highest is to give Him all-out worship)

Anyway, as I was reading today I came across another verse a couple of chapters past the one above.  Here it is...

Ha!  Don't you just love God's Word!?  I have not yet heard God's tangible voice, but I have heard His voice.  Sometimes it has sounded like it did today; words that bypassed the use of volume.  Other times it has been through the voice of a friend, or mentor.  Often it has even sounded like a child...
How well have I been listening?

If you are praying, 'search me, try me, know me, lead me' then be aware of those who God may be trying to answer you through.  Be humble.  Listen well.  Live well.

Be humble.  Listen well.  Live well.

Today I went to a funeral for someone I had never met... someone who really lived. (http://www.danielroberthall.net/)  Having known Robert's in-laws for many years, we simply came to quietly stand with them in their pain.

I sat, stood, listened, pondered, cried, sang, reminisced, repented and worshiped for almost 3 1/2 hours.  One of the very last things spoken was that there was a sense that this had truly been a 'significant' time. I think that says it in the best way for me. I am still digesting. 

Even though much was said to describe this life so sorely missed, I walked away reflecting that this had definitely been a service that commemorated our Lord.  I listened as many gave testimony that Rob Hall was a man who loved well and left the fragrance of Christ where-ever he went.  Without anyone obviously striving, it was Christ was ultimately honoured as His characteristics & purposes were described through the life & actions of Rob's.  Magnificent! 

Thank you.  Thank you for sharing your memories with us.  Thank you for the truth spoken midst the pain. 

Katie & the kids, I will keep praying for you.

Jim & Kathy, I am praying for you as well.  You are loved.

Teach me.  Show me the path.  Guide me today.
Shine, so I can see where to put my feet.  Lord, I am walking in obedience.  Give me renewed passion & purpose for You. 
May I, like Phinehas, do Your will in this complicated world.
Psalm 106:30-31, Numbers 25

Jesus, You were there in the beginning; fashioning, shaping the world, the generations and me.  Thousands of yeas ago (in human terms:) You were planning, strategizing and creating. 
May I be struck by Your Majesty!

Jesus, if You were there in the beginning, then you were surely there when perfection fell.  You saw the greed & forgetfulness, the shame & nakedness.  You saw the cowering to hide as Your holiness drew near in friendship.  And you clothed them.
May I know Your love.  May I fear Your holiness. May I love like you do.
Genesis 3

And Jesus, You watched the generations trust, then forget over and over again.  You watched with Your Father as the nations chose to not serve You wholly.  You watched Your very own people choose evil over good.  And yet, You came to give another chance.  To redeem.  You gave everything to woo them back.  They didn't even know it was You!  You suffered humiliation.  You took all of our sin... my sin.  You sacrificed it with Your body and died.
May I be full of Your grace & mercy toward others.

Then, Jesus, You rose up; back to life.  Death could not hold Innocence.  You put all my sin to death and came back stronger than ever!  You are my King.  You have killed my debt.  You have given me life without shame.
May I live in it!
May I worship You forever!
May I always remember.

Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends.  John 15:13

Psalm 72:11 - All kings will bow before him, and all nations will serve him.

Isaiah 7:15 - By the time this child is old enough to choose what is right and reject what is wrong, he will be eating yogurt and honey.

Isaiah 9:6 - For a child is born to us, a son is given to us. The government will rest on his shoulders. And he will be called: Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.

Isaiah 11:1 - Out of the stump of David’s family will grow a shoot—yes, a new Branch bearing fruit from the old root.

Micah 5:2 - But you, O Bethlehem Ephrathah, are only a small village among all the people of Judah. Yet a ruler of Israel will come from you, one whose origins are from the distant past.

Matthew 1:23 - “Look! The virgin will conceive a child! She will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel, which means ‘God is with us.’”

Luke 1:14 - You will have great joy and gladness, and many will rejoice at his birth.

The Nativity Story
Matthew 1:18-25 - This is how Jesus the Messiah was born. His mother, Mary, was engaged to be married to Joseph. But before the marriage took place, while she was still a virgin, she became pregnant through the power of the Holy Spirit. Joseph, her fiancé, was a good man and did not want to disgrace her publicly, so he decided to break the engagement quietly. As he considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream. “Joseph, son of David,” the angel said, “do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife. For the child within her was conceived by the Holy Spirit. And she will have a son, and you are to name him Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins.” All of this occurred to fulfill the Lord’s message through his prophet: “Look! The virgin will conceive a child! She will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel, which means ‘God is with us.’” When Joseph woke up, he did as the angel of the Lord commanded and took Mary as his wife. But he did not have sexual relations with her until her son was born. And Joseph named him Jesus.

Matthew 2: 1-23 - Jesus was born in Bethlehem in Judea, during the reign of King Herod. About that time some wise men from eastern lands arrived in Jerusalem, asking, “Where is the newborn king of the Jews? We saw his star as it rose, and we have come to worship him.” King Herod was deeply disturbed when he heard this, as was everyone in Jerusalem. 4 He called a meeting of the leading priests and teachers of religious law and asked, “Where is the Messiah supposed to be born?” “In Bethlehem in Judea,” they said, “for this is what the prophet wrote: ‘And you, O Bethlehem in the land of Judah, are not least among the ruling cities of Judah, for a ruler will come from you who will be the shepherd for my people Israel.’”

Then Herod called for a private meeting with the wise men, and he learned from them the time when the star first appeared. Then he told them, “Go to Bethlehem and search carefully for the child. And when you find him, come back and tell me so that I can go and worship him, too!” After this interview the wise men went their way. And the star they had seen in the east guided them to Bethlehem. It went ahead of them and stopped over the place where the child was. When they saw the star, they were filled with joy! They entered the house and saw the child with his mother, Mary, and they bowed down and worshiped him. Then they opened their treasure chests and gave him gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh. When it was time to leave, they returned to their own country by another route, for God had warned them in a dream not to return to Herod.

After the wise men were gone, an angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream. “Get up! Flee to Egypt with the child and his mother,” the angel said. “Stay there until I tell you to return, because Herod is going to search for the child to kill him.” That night Joseph left for Egypt with the child and Mary, his mother, and they stayed there until Herod’s death. This fulfilled what the Lord had spoken through the prophet: “I called my Son out of Egypt.” Herod was furious when he realized that the wise men had outwitted him. He sent soldiers to kill all the boys in and around Bethlehem who were two years old and under, based on the wise men’s report of the star’s first appearance. Herod’s brutal action fulfilled what God had spoken through the prophet Jeremiah:

“A cry was heard in Ramah—weeping and great mourning. Rachel weeps for her children, refusing to be comforted, for they are dead.”

When Herod died, an angel of the Lord appeared in a dream to Joseph in Egypt. “Get up!” the angel said. “Take the child and his mother back to the land of Israel, because those who were trying to kill the child are dead.” So Joseph got up and returned to the land of Israel with Jesus and his mother. 22 But when he learned that the new ruler of Judea was Herod’s son Archelaus, he was afraid to go there. Then, after being warned in a dream, he left for the region of Galilee. So the family went and lived in a town called Nazareth. This fulfilled what the prophets had said: “He will be called a Nazarene.”

Luke 2: 1-20 - At that time the Roman emperor, Augustus, decreed that a census should be taken throughout the Roman Empire. (This was the first census taken when Quirinius was governor of Syria.) All returned to their own ancestral towns to register for this census. And because Joseph was a descendant of King David, he had to go to Bethlehem in Judea, David’s ancient home. He traveled there from the village of Nazareth in Galilee. He took with him Mary, his fiancée, who was now obviously pregnant. And while they were there, the time came for her baby to be born. She gave birth to her first child, a son. She wrapped him snugly in strips of cloth and laid him in a manger, because there was no lodging available for them.

That night there were shepherds staying in the fields nearby, guarding their flocks of sheep. Suddenly, an angel of the Lord appeared among them, and the radiance of the Lord’s glory surrounded them. They were terrified, but the angel reassured them. “Don’t be afraid!” he said. “I bring you good news that will bring great joy to all people. The Savior—yes, the Messiah, the Lord—has been born today in Bethlehem, the city of David! And you will recognize him by this sign: You will find a baby wrapped snugly in strips of cloth, lying in a manger.” Suddenly, the angel was joined by a vast host of others—the armies of heaven—praising God and saying, “Glory to God in highest heaven, and peace on earth to those with whom God is pleased.” When the angels had returned to heaven, the shepherds said to each other, “Let’s go to Bethlehem! Let’s see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has told us about.” They hurried to the village and found Mary and Joseph. And there was the baby, lying in the manger. After seeing him, the shepherds told everyone what had happened and what the angel had said to them about this child. All who heard the shepherds’ story were astonished, but Mary kept all these things in her heart and thought about them often. 20 The shepherds went back to their flocks, glorifying and praising God for all they had heard and seen. It was just as the angel had told them.

Good Tidings of Christmas Joy Psalm 98:4 - Shout to the Lord, all the earth; break out in praise and sing for joy!

Luke 2:10 - but the angel reassured them. “Don’t be afraid!” he said. “I bring you good news that will bring great joy to all people.

John 3:16 - For God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.

1 John 4: 7-14 - Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is a child of God and knows God. But anyone who does not love does not know God, for God is love. God showed how much he loved us by sending his one and only Son into the world so that we might have eternal life through him. This is real love—not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins. Dear friends, since God loved us that much, we surely ought to love each other. No one has ever seen God. But if we love each other, God lives in us, and his love is brought to full expression in us. And God has given us his Spirit as proof that we live in him and he in us. Furthermore, we have seen with our own eyes and now testify that the Father sent his Son to be the Savior of the world. NLT

It's amazing to me how I can now be so fed and motivated by the Psalms whereas a few years ago, I did not have the fortitude to read them.

I've been taking the time to read through the book of Psalms again.  In all honesty, it has been a very long time since I did this.  I mean, I read a Psalm here or there among other things, but I have not journeyed through the whole book now for quite some time.

Today, as I was reading chapter 37, I recalled the struggle of a few years ago.  It was after my dad died.  The very last thing that my dad said in his right mind was, "The Lord is my Shepherd ... what more is there to say!"  From there he went into 3 open heart surgeries (in the span of 4 days!), months of struggling to heal, heavy depression and subsequent suicide...

An anger toward God's seemingly lack of 'shepherding' built up in me to the point that I could not even digest the words of the psalmists.  Today, over 12 years later, as I began to read Psalm 37.

"Do not fret because of those who are evil or be envious of those who do wrong; for like the grass they will soon wither, like green plants they will soon die away. Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn, your vindication like the noonday sun."

My mind wandered...  The thought flipped through my head, "Wow, anger is really damaging.  It distorts truth and works in a kind of short-sited, fast judgment sort of way.  I was so wrong in my thinking when I was angry!"

Then my mind went back to Psalm 37 and I continued reading: 

"Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when people succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes. Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret—it leads only to evil."

Ha!  Isn't God funny!  He confirmed my thoughts without me even looking for it!! 

(read the rest of the story here to finish chapter 37)

God has answered my prayer.  He has given me fortitude again to read His word and to believe and trust Him. He can do that for you too.  If you haven't allowed your eyes to drink from God's word lately, pick it up.  His cup is really full of good stuff!

Ever been in a transition zone? I have and am again... The question is, will I view it as intrusion or adventure?

I have heard the word 'transition' so often the past few years, that I am starting to view it as a swear word!! What? This is transition, again? I don’t know if it’s become an excuse or if it is actual reality but whatever the case, it seems to be an unavoidable plight... or adventure.  It depends on how you look at it.

Life is transition. A baby displays it almost daily, and then children are in constant flux as their bodies stretch and form and their minds grow and expand into maturity. Ah, that’s where it’s supposed to stop, eh? …at maturity. Ha! Well, I’m 48 and I’m still not quite sure if I am mature; you know, settled down, wise & correct, knowing exactly what I was made for and where I am headed. For example, in the past few years I have had a change in job, church home, mom status (as in graduated to nana), body (I’ll leave it at that!), music opportunities, etc… And, by no means are these all negative! They just represent significant shifts that have pulled me out of some very comfortable spots; sometimes spots that I felt I had found my niche in! Anyway, enough of me!! I don’t know if this sounds familiar to you, but the reality in the western world is that ‘change’ is very much a part of our lives and more so all the time.

How do I cope? I would say that my greatest pursuit over the past while has been simply to find the ‘rest’ of God. The demands and pace of life are often too hard to carry. You see, Jesus keeps pulling us back to Himself. He wants us to live in His pace and promises rest for our souls if we do that. He promises that if I seek Him first, all of the stuff of life will be taken care of.* Here are some verses that have been speaking to me lately; ones that were so familiar to me that I seemed to have forgotten about them:

     Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding.
     In all your ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your paths.
     (Proverbs 3:5-6)

Actually, the whole chapter is well worth digesting as it serves us a good reminder of how to be happy in life. You’ll have to ignore the heading though if you’re past 30, at least the one in my Bible, as it says ‘Guidance for the Young’. But hey, even though my body is aging, my spirit isn’t. It is eternal. May God keep me young enough to always trust & lean on Him. May God always remind me of the things that I learned when I was young.
Ah, maybe that’s why there are so many ‘transitions’…

*Matthew 11:28-30; Matthew 6:33

   Trust
            in the Lord with all your heart,
       Lean not
            on your own understanding.
     In all your ways
                  acknowledge Him and He shall direct your paths.
                                               (Proverbs 3:5-6)

Actually, the whole chapter (Proverbs 3) is well worth digesting as it serves us a good reminder of how to be happy in life. You’ll have to ignore the heading though if you’re past 30, at least the one in my Bible, as it says ‘Guidance for the Young’. But hey, even though my body is aging, my spirit isn’t. It is eternal. May God keep me young enough to always trust & lean on Him. May God always remind me of the things that I learned when I was young.

Ah, maybe that’s why there are so many ‘transitions’…